A giant spider recently spun its web behind the front gate of my home. This would not have been a big deal except that my daughter Emily’s best friend was on her way over and she is terrified of spiders.  I texted her immediately suggesting that she come into the house through the garage to avoid the spider. This was very mindful of me but then I sent one text too many. I sent her an image of the spider not knowing that even images of spiders are very frightening for her. Needless to say, she made it in safely.

It was a very long hot summer and fall dealing with bugs. At our home it is spiders and mosquitos. As a Buddhist, I try to be very compassionate to all bugs but it is a complicated relationship. I still make distinctions between good bugs and bad bugs even though they are all just trying to live their lives. For example, I really like spiders while detesting mosquitos.

Secretly I use spiders as my surrogates to eliminate the bugs I do not like. They take them out for me so I don’t have to feel guilty about disposing of them myself. I try very hard not to ever harm a bug. I am even respecting silverfish now which have always given me the creeps as well.

“If you think you are too small to make a difference, you haven't spent the night with a mosquito.” —African proverb quoted by the Dalai Lama.

At night I can hear mosquitos buzzing around my ears. I was told once that only the male mosquitos make noise but don’t bite. Rather, it is the silent females that actually do the biting. They need blood to raise their babies.

Buddhism also has a complicated relationship with bugs. Even the Dalai Lama has addressed these vexing bug issues. We are supposed to respect all life and yet there may be a mosquito drinking blood from my arm at night while I am sleeping.

 “The Dalai Lama was once asked about swatting mosquitoes. He chuckled and said that if his mood is good, he will often just let the creature have a little blood.  If another one comes, his patience might become stretched a little thin and he would blow the offending creature off his arm. If yet a third mosquito comes, His Holiness said he is likely to give it a careful little shove off his arm.” —https://tricycle.org/article/kill-impulse-compassionate-solutions-your-favorite-pest/

I also heard a story about a time when the Dalai Lama was sitting for a very important interview, when suddenly he got up without any explanation and walked away. Everyone thought that perhaps he was insulted or feeling ill. But instead, he walked across the room, and kneeled down and cupped his hands together on the floor, cradling a spider in his hands. Then he waked to the window and gently set it free.

I am happy to say that I too do this for the bugs in my home. I follow a “no kill” policy. Instead, I pick them up gently in a tissue and then safely set them free outdoors. I even twice saved the same alligator lizard from drowning in our pool. Each time placing it back in the front yard.

In my life, I have made a lot of bug compassion progress but I am still unable to calmly let a mosquito feed on my arm while in silent meditation. But as a consolation, I do show mercy to silverfish now. I also really appreciate the advice from Richard Gere, a follower of the Dalai Lama.

“‘Teach [children] to respect insects.’ That is what the Dalai Lama said. If they can learn to love something that to them is innately ugly and small, learn that an insect has the same life force as they, that’s the beginning. And basically, you have to watch yourself. If you want your child to be special, you have to be special: generous, kind, loving, forgiving.” —Richard Gere

I strive to follow this teaching above everyday but I still find myself sometimes behaving like this one below.

“True story. I'm not a monk but have been a practicing Buddhist for many years. One night a couple of years ago I was sitting up in bed reading a book by the Dalai Lama. Out of the corner of my eye I saw something crawling on the wall right by my head and before a second of thought I smashed a spider with THE DALAI LAMA book! Wham! To this day I feel bad … but the irony still cracks me up.” —Jenny Wright, Reiki Master Teacher (2000–present)

I think this story is the most realistic. We often react without thinking and then feel guilty about it. Through practice and mindfulness, we will, in time, begin to think before we act. I have made a lot of progress but I am afraid that I will still let the spiders catch bugs for me so that I can live guilt free. Even when doing good, I am still calculating. But it is still progress. At least now I am aware of what I am doing rather than being in complete denial. My respect for all insects is growing.

Namoamidabutsu, Rev Jon Turner